Fake Friday: Ormes Furniture Still Attempting To Go-Out-Of-Business After 100 Years

Ottawa - The perpetually going-out-of-business sale at Ormes Furniture continues into its 100th year with a special sale commemorating the fact it has been trying to go-out-of-business for the last 100 years, with little success. Year after year, radio ads announce that Ormes Furniture is finally going out of business, but yet it still continues to survive. This Friday the marketing team at Ormes launch their "No, We Really Are Going Out Of Business Sale, For Real This Time" sale which will offer consumers unbelievable savings on quality wood furniture at unbeatable prices.

Drastic reductions on prices in all departments will hopefully put an end to the continual attempts to go-out-of business at Ormes, which has been struggling to go bankrupt for years and validate their claims they really are going-out-of-business.

Solid wood dining sets, bedroom suites and quality leather sofas have all been priced below wholesale costs to put the business in jeopardy and finally make them actually go-out-of-business as their radio ads constantly claim. “Since 1954 we have been trying to go out of business, but we just can’t seem to go into the red enough to actually do it.” explained Ormes President, Ned Ormes whose father, Bill Ormes, placed the first “Going-Out-Business Sale” radio ad in 1954. Since then, both Bill and Ned have been attempting to shut down the 150 year old furniture store that first opened on Sparks Street in 1861. “For generations we have attempted to go-out-of-business and end this nightmare of trying to sell discounted real wood furniture.” Ned remarked after contacting the local radio station about their “No, We Really Are Going Out Of Business Sale, For Real This Time” ad that will air this week on the CHUM radio network. Ned, a fifth generation Ormes, hopes this blow-out sale will spell the end of Ormes Furniture once and for all. “Let’s hope this time we really do go-out-of-business so we don’t have to have another door crasher sale next month.”

Editor’s note: Every Friday on OttawaStart, we feature a “best of” post from the-o-dot, the satircal Ottawa blog. This article originally appeared here.